Category Archives: On My Mind

This is for the Haters

With my summer at home drawing to a close (leaving in one week!) I’ve been thinking about my role as a teacher, and my responsibility in the lives of young people. I’ve written about why I teach in the past, but I don’t think I’ve touched on some of the experiences that helped me understand that my job is really to shape minds.

The way I see it, one of my responsibilities as an educator is to make sure that my students grow up to be responsible global citizens who are empowered to affect change. I believe that everyone has the power to make some sort of change, either in one’s own life or in the wider world. The way I choose to do that is to help young people realize that such change is possible. I affect change by cultivating my students’ ideas so that they believe in themselves.

Or, at the very least, I try my hardest.

When I was in high school, it used to be cool and slangy to use the phrase “that’s so gay” to describe something obnoxious, irritating, annoying, boring, or simply uncool. (With any luck, I have just dated myself.) That bothered me long before being an ally was an accepted part of society. I felt the same way about the word “retarded”, which was also in vogue amongst my peers, and which also takes on a variety of negative meanings when tossed around by teenagers with pants around their knees (yes, that was also cool at the time, which should say a thing or two about how we’ve all managed to grow up). When I was 17, I finally felt comfortable enough with myself to stand up and say something. I remember looking at my boyfriend, and later at a handful of other friends, and saying, “That’s offensive to me. If you mean “stupid,” just say so. You wouldn’t say “straight” for “cool”, so you shouldn’t use “gay” for “stupid. Please don’t do that around me.”

They rolled their eyes, they scoffed at my attitude, but they listened. I remember my boyfriend giving me a what-the-hell look and then saying to me, “I’ll stop if it really bothers you, but you’ll have to help me.”

And that’s the way it went. It turned out that a lot of people in my social circles back in 2007 had similar feelings but had tossed around slang the way kids toss around slang; without thinking. As a teacher, I try to use language that empowers my students. I vividly remember opening a class discussion my first year teaching about the difference between being ignorant and not knowing. The comment, “I just can’t talk to her! She’s ignorant, she doesn’t know anything!” following a disagreement between two students about race promoted the discussion. We concluded that ignorance is knowing and ignoring, while not knowing is simply not knowing. Rather than blaming one another for being uncertain, or for lack of knowledge, we can teach. I honestly don’t remember the comments made leading to this discussion, but I remember taking my teacher voice out of my pocket and saying, “Stop. We need to back up here.” And both of those students later thanked me for doing it.

As simple as it sounds, the biggest idea I can help my students understand is that if you choose not to act, there will be no results. I’ve heard every excuse for inaction: “But I’m just one person.” “No one will listen.” “Honestly, I have other things to worry about.” “That’s so much work.” “I’m just going to live in a cardboard box and be happy.” “There’s too much hate and too many haters to even bother trying.”

So, haters, here I am calling you out for ignorance.

Haters claim that the world is too big with too many problems so individuals can’t solve them. Haters claim that there’s no point in looking out for others because you never know when someone’s going to stab you in the back. Haters claim that you can’t fix other people so you should only worry about yourself.

Haters are ignorant, because they know better. They have seen change and they know that it comes from people doing exactly those things that are really very hard.

Haters, in short, are wrong.

Wrong because there are people who care, who dream, who believe, who yearn. There are people who look around dissatisfied and are not content to remain dissatisfied. There are people who hope, who watch, who wait and get impatient; instead of giving up, those people act. They do something. Instead of growing increasingly irritated with people with whom they do not agree, they make changes. They work to understand. They surround themselves with like-minded people, and find power in groups.

History is full of groups who acted, groups who fought, groups who won. There is strength in numbers, and I want my students to believe in themselves, join those groups, and make the changes that they, at 14, 15, 16, or 17, represented and endorsed in my classes. If I didn’t believe they could do it, I wouldn’t say so; I would lose all credibility as a teacher, as a mentor.

Haters, I know some people who are going to rock your world. Hold on tightly.

What blog?

Well, I’m certainly not going to win any points for blogging this summer! Life in Rochester at the moment is certainly much calmer and quieter than life travelling around Southeast Asia and trying to teach at a school trying desperately to prevent teaching. It’s certainly been a welcome calm.

Mitch has been interviewing for jobs across the country and I’ve been getting ready for my move to Singapore. I’ll be teaching three new courses come August. I’ve taught pieces of two of them before and none of the third, so I’m trying to get as much basic content work as possible completed before I go so I can focus on pedagogy and resources when I’m there. I didn’t plan to spend this summer working on the boat again, but one of the captains called me and begged, so I’m doing that, too.

And yes, my summer “office” is gorgeous.

Otherwise, this has been another chapter in my journey to find out who my real friends are. There are people in Rochester who I no longer feel the need to see, and people I wish were still interested in keeping in touch. On the other hand, there are people in Malaysia with whom I’m still in touch. I’m also in touch with friends who left Malaysia months ago, both of which make me happy. I’m trying really hard to focus on people who care about me now, not people who cared about me (or who I cared about) back in the day.

All this to say, I know I’ve been neglecting my blog. It’s not really been on my radar at all, with all this focusing on the here and now. Except a whole host of updates and regular posts when I get to Singapore in a little over two weeks. For now, enjoy the pictures of the Erie Canal! And, as always, thanks for reading.

Steps Forward

It has now been 11 days since Mitch and I returned to Rochester. In that time, I’ve marveled over American efficiency, enjoyed much-missed diner breakfast, remembered why I like running, visited my old “stomping grounds” with friends, and spent a great deal of time with my family. I also made a decision about the future.

Over the weekend, I booked my one-way flight to Singapore. I called Mitch before I clicked “submit payment” and he encouraged me to go for it. For a cost, just about anything is reversible. (Not that I plan to incur that cost, but it’s a comforting thought.) 

For the time being, I’ll remain mum about Mitch’s plans and prospects. Don’t want to jinx anything. In a likelihood, we’ll spend a year apart in order to make some money and gain some experience before moving forward, wherever that happens to be.